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Nothing Left To Do

Music and Lyric by David W. Jacobsen
Copyright 2020. All Rights Reserved.

I fought for my country, but they called me fainting Frank
The folks back home gave honor, so I took it to the bank
It was my chance to show them my great spunk
There's nothing left to do but to get drunk

Elevation unexpected, I was a compromise
To just about everyone it was a surprise
I took the reins and some say that I would flunk
There's nothing left to do but get drunk

With tragedy and death accompanying me in
It was not the best way for my reign to begin
I tried to make all happy, and my stature just shrunk
There's nothing left to do but get drunk

I never thought I'd reach the top and be the big boss
While I was there, I took it easy on the sauce
But afterwards when all the things in life I would lose
I found my best friend in this world was the booze

I tried to keep expanding with a little success
But compared to those before me I would hardly impress
None of my decisions would be a slam dunk
There's nothing left to do but get drunk

With bleeding and fighting in the middle of the land
I had to pick a side, either way I'd be damned
All of my choices, they just stunk
There's nothing left to do but get drunk

Sometimes I think about the strange ways of fate
Mostly I just stay at home and self-medicate
Leadership some say I never mastered
There's little left to do now but get plastered

So my term came to end with not much to show
I tried to stay on but they told me where to go
I went to run again and my chances were sunk
There's nothing left to do but get drunk

A mob came to my door, when a better leader died
Clamoring for my blood 'cause they didn't think I cried
But with my oratory, some lies I could debunk
There's nothing left to do but get drunk

Notes:

Franklin Pierce was a terrible president. He is the only elected president who sought a second term but whose own party declined to re-nominate him. The only other cases were vice presidents who assumed the office when the president kicked it or presidents who didn't actually want to run again. When the Democrats nominated James Buchanan instead of him, his quote on the matter was, "There's nothing left to do but to get drunk." And he did. He would die of cirrhosis of the liver.

He had a rough time of it. He had three children and two died very young, leaving only the third child alive at the time he was elected. Between his election and his swearing in, he was in a railroad accident where his only remaining child was killed before his eyes as his railroad car tumbled off the tracks and down a hill. Six weeks after being elected, his vice president died too. He was in way over his head and the problems facing the country in the lead up to the civil war were far beyond his capabilities.

From the album Potus
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